J.R. Briggs
Attempting to behold the miracle long enough without falling asleep
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Death by television
Megan and I were married almost 11 years ago. And we’ve never owned a television.
You probably think we’re weird (and if you do, we don’t mind). We are a part of that uniquely quirky 4% of Americans who don’t own a TV.
It’s not because we believe television is entirely evil (although, let’s be honest, there certainly are parts of it that are). It’s not that we’re too cool or that we’re trying to be Luddites. Yes, we have smart phones. We have the internet. We sometimes watch movies on our laptop (we have a Netflix account) and watch live sports from time to time (ESPN3 is a nice treat). But we’ve never owned a television. And, if I can be quite frank here, I’m not sure we miss much.
During our engagement a wise couple gave us a challenge: don’t have a television for your first year of marriage. We took them up on the challenge and, in the process, developed healthy patterns and expectation of how our evenings would be spent. (The entire story of what we learned and how that came about is for another post at another time).
Is refraining from owning a television a universal principle we want every person on the planet to adopt? No. Do we condescendingly look down on people who own one? No. Do we sometimes wish we owned one? Yes. But do we grieve when we see people wasting their lives away sitting in front of the TV screen waiting for their next “favorite show” to come on? Absolutely. And this grieving happens way too often.
Recently, through a few interactions, I’ve been struck by how prevalent television is in our culture. This “must see TV” generation is dying a slow death of boredom. Reality TV sucks us in. And maybe the reason reality TV is so appealing is that our own lives and our own stories are so unappealing.
We have only one life to live. Only one. How will you invest it?
Someone recently found out about our no-TV lifestyle. With a shocked look on his face he asked me, “How do you find out what is going on in the world?” I informed him of incredibly cutting edge technologies such as the newspaper, radio, conversation with other people and this amazing thing called the internet.
After he realized other forms of technology exist he asked, “So what do you do with your free time?” For us, life is full and busy as young parents of two active boys – and for me as a pastor. But when there is free time, there are lots of things to do: spend time with my kids, read, connect with friends, play games, go on trips, work out, ride bikes, pursue hobbies, host people at our home, rest, etc, etc, etc…
Then he admitted this to me: “I don’t think I could go a week without television. I watch it all the time.” And then the kicker: “Even if you gave me $50,000 to go TV-free for a year, I couldn’t do it.”
This startled me.
Where it most startles me is that this is someone who considers himself a Christian – and who has told me a few times before he has no time to read his Bible or pray. He’s just too busy.
Please hear me: I’m not slamming television watching. At times, it can very appropriate, wholesome, significant, educational, relational and enjoyable. But how much time do we waste? How much brain matter do we use on meaningless things? How many hours do we spend glued in front of a screen by ourselves on the couch when other family members are in other rooms of the house doing the same thing? How many situations are we in that lead us to sin because of what we’re watching? Will any of us on our deathbeds wished we had watched just one more episode of Two and a Half Men? We are a generation being discipled by Hollywood through our televisions.
Some things to consider:
- How might your life be different if your television broke and it couldn’t be repaired for six months?
- How might our culture be different if TV’s were banned in America?
- How might we live more significant, more relationally connected, more focused lives if television were illegal?
- For those of us who consider ourselves followers of Jesus, how might our lives be shaped differently to be more like Christ if we didn’t have one?
- Practically speaking, what if you participated in a techno-fast and didn’t watch television (or look at any screen, for that matter) for a week – or a month? What might that do to your soul?
Joshua Rhone said...
1J.R.,
Crystal and I recently celebrated our eighth anniversary. We’ve owned a television for all eight years of married life, but have eschewed cable and satellite for the vast majority of the time.
Although we have been subscribers to Hulu+ and Netflix, we simply don’t have the time to “invest” in watching television. Between making time for one another and our children, ministry, education, etc. there are simply not enough hours in the day for us to devote much time to television viewing.
Interestingly, the longer we go without television programming, the more I find myself bored by what is on when we are in locations that do have cable/satellite. To state it rather pointedly: so much of what is on is devoid of plot, character development, etc.
All of that leads me to say that I think our lives would be richer, our relationships deeper, and our love of Jesus more passionate if we were to devote the time spent in front of the television elsewhere. (I’d also venture a guess that our attention spans would increase and that our ability to think critically would follow suit.)
06/20/12 9:42 AM | Comment Link
Hypothetically speaking... - JoshuaRhone.com said...
2[...] “Death by Television,” J.R. Briggs [...]
06/20/12 10:00 AM | Comment Link
Luke said...
3Thanks for sharing this crazy “challenge” JR! My wife and I were given the exact same wisdom before getting married…and I continue to give it to others. There was something about a year TV fast that changed us forever. And while we do have a TV, we rarely use it and get a show here and there online. One of my hopes is that I’ll see some other crazy newlyweds take the First Year TV Challenge
06/20/12 5:31 PM | Comment Link
Jesse Joyner said...
4J.R.,
Sarah and I are with you guys in the 4%, largely because neither of us had TV’s in our dorm rooms at Taylor. We got married shortly after graduating and just never got a television. Yes, we watch ESPN3, Hulu (though its TOUGH to find anything worthwhile on there), and DVD’s on our computer. Yet it is very refreshing not to have that huge thing staring at us in the living room. We LOVE not having a television. I don’t think our lives are any less without one (well, unless there is a really good sports game that’s not online), but then I just watch it at a restaurant or a friend’s house, which is more fun anyway…
-Jesse
06/20/12 10:15 PM | Comment Link
Matt West said...
5This is certainly a topic of much discussion in our household. We are one of the few households who only have 1 tv. We are also firm believers in no tv in bedrooms. My childhood was mostly tv free, so I certainly don’t have the need to always be “connected”. I think it’s a relevant discussion to continue so we can reasses how we as humans evolve (regress?) physically, spiritually, and emotionally.
06/21/12 7:12 AM | Comment Link
J.R. Briggs said...
6Luke: yes, when I do premarital counseling, I always suggest this as something to seriously consider when developing habits in that significant first year of marriage.
06/21/12 8:11 AM | Comment Link
J.R. Briggs said...
7Matt – yes, studies are beginning to show (no surprise) childhood obesity and the massive amounts of time spent each day/week in front of a TV. But also, screen time is changing the way the brain functions, scientists are finding. I find this to be startling.
However, for us, the main decision is just pure quality of life measures. I don’t want to miss something significant in life that was right in front of me that I missed simply because I was staring at a screen…
06/21/12 8:13 AM | Comment Link
J.R. Briggs said...
8Jesse –
It’s good to meet other members of the 4%! (I’m starting to sound similarly to the Occupy Movement)
Yes, we are in the same boat. Most games are online, but the significant ones are enjoyed best with friends anyway. My biggest hangup is massive amounts of TV watched by oneself. Connecting with friends over a movie or a ballgame is great because much relational connection occurs.
The point of this entire conversation (and I think most are getting it) is watching television takes purposeful discernment and moderation.
06/21/12 8:15 AM | Comment Link
Mark Steinacher said...
9Another well-crafted blog-post!
Your comments on the ability of TV to “suck in” folk, as well as your positive input with your kids by playing games reminds me of a conversation in grad school with an English prof, with whom I was studying Anglo-Saxon sermons.
In one tutorial session, he acted an imaginary conversation between a 20th century TV addict and a 10th century Anglo-Saxon. Part of it went like this: “You mean you would rather sit in a dark room and look at that box? But…you could be singing a song! You could be puzzling a riddle! You could tell a tale of grand adventure!”
Even among my preacher friends, very few are skilled raconteurs (in contrast to raccoon-furs
. Their story-telling abilities are stunted, in large part due to being a “consumer” of stories, rather than a “sharer” of stories.
I’ll close by adding that I appreciate your gracious tone. This is part of your life, an important part, but you are willing to let others differ. You invite them, however, to discover the joys and benefits to be found in a non-mainstream approach to television. Good show! (pun intended)
06/22/12 12:37 PM | Comment Link
J.R. Briggs said...
10Thanks for your thoughts, Mark, and thank you for your kind words. I certainly hope I can attempt (though imperfectly, for sure) to carry a respectful tone in all I do, say, think and write.
06/22/12 12:45 PM | Comment Link
Quinn said...
11Do you think the time is approaching when you will start advising people to go a year without internet?
06/25/12 6:30 PM | Comment Link
J.R. Briggs said...
12Great question, Quinn! I’ll have to think about that. But, yes, I do think we are close (and I think this might be more difficult for people than going without a TV).
06/25/12 6:37 PM | Comment Link
Meghan said...
13For a number of years, Matt suggested that we go without the one television in our home, and I objected every time. I didn’t want to. Last November though, our TV broke out of the blue. So we jumped into this new adventure before us, and we’ve loved it. More quiet. More conversation between the two of us. More quality time. More reading. We have no plans of replacing the tv or getting it fixed for the time being. Should’ve listened to Matt earlier.
07/7/12 9:13 PM | Comment Link