Comments on: Unlearning Mental Illness in the Church http://www.jrbriggs.com/unlearning-mental-illness-in-the-church/05/ Attempting to behold the miracle long enough without falling asleep Wed, 10 Mar 2010 16:54:48 -0800 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.4 hourly 1 By: Dave Eckert http://www.jrbriggs.com/unlearning-mental-illness-in-the-church/05/comment-page-1/#comment-2967 Dave Eckert Thu, 04 Jun 2009 21:36:58 +0000 http://www.jrbriggs.com/?p=1338#comment-2967 Anna, you've brought up some really good points. I've definitely seen situations where people have burned out from their attempts at supporting people with mental illness. It seems to me that one reason this happens is because people define their success as helpers in the wrong way. The helpers who've done the best at avoiding burnout have been those who judge success by (1) whether they've provided another person with an opportunity to use their help and (2) whether they've offered the best possible help they know how to provide. In other words, they judge success by what they can control. When I've forgetten where I end and the other person begins, I find myself getting angry and exhausted because I feel the person isn't using my help in the way I think he or she should. Also, when you mentioned the person who is being disruptive within the church in Seattle, I was reminded of the importance of "reality". Alan Keith-Lucas in his fantastic book, "Giving and Taking Help" has written that all good help requires reality, empathy and support. All 3 go together. While we should be empathetic and supportive of people with mental illness, we can't change reality for them. For example, I've had to have difficult conversations with people over the years regarding how they respond to their employer. The reality of our world is that if you yell at your boss, there's a good chance you'll get fired. This reality doesn't change because you have a mental illness. Furthermore, I've seen a church have to ask a person to leave their worship gathering because the person was repeatedly standing up and making sexual comments to the pastor. Some may think it was harsh of the church to do this but the church gave the person multiple chances and the person didn't change. In the long run, I think the person learned more and grew more from being asked to leave the gathering than if the church had just allowed her to stay. I will say, though, that pointing out reality to someone doesn't have to mean ending the relationship with the person or giving up on them. Anna, you’ve brought up some really good points. I’ve definitely seen situations where people have burned out from their attempts at supporting people with mental illness. It seems to me that one reason this happens is because people define their success as helpers in the wrong way. The helpers who’ve done the best at avoiding burnout have been those who judge success by (1) whether they’ve provided another person with an opportunity to use their help and (2) whether they’ve offered the best possible help they know how to provide. In other words, they judge success by what they can control. When I’ve forgetten where I end and the other person begins, I find myself getting angry and exhausted because I feel the person isn’t using my help in the way I think he or she should. Also, when you mentioned the person who is being disruptive within the church in Seattle, I was reminded of the importance of “reality”. Alan Keith-Lucas in his fantastic book, “Giving and Taking Help” has written that all good help requires reality, empathy and support. All 3 go together. While we should be empathetic and supportive of people with mental illness, we can’t change reality for them. For example, I’ve had to have difficult conversations with people over the years regarding how they respond to their employer. The reality of our world is that if you yell at your boss, there’s a good chance you’ll get fired. This reality doesn’t change because you have a mental illness. Furthermore, I’ve seen a church have to ask a person to leave their worship gathering because the person was repeatedly standing up and making sexual comments to the pastor. Some may think it was harsh of the church to do this but the church gave the person multiple chances and the person didn’t change. In the long run, I think the person learned more and grew more from being asked to leave the gathering than if the church had just allowed her to stay. I will say, though, that pointing out reality to someone doesn’t have to mean ending the relationship with the person or giving up on them.

]]> By: Art Costigan http://www.jrbriggs.com/unlearning-mental-illness-in-the-church/05/comment-page-1/#comment-2961 Art Costigan Mon, 01 Jun 2009 12:21:58 +0000 http://www.jrbriggs.com/?p=1338#comment-2961 The church needs to face this issue in two ways. It needs to face the fact that much of mental illness is not a truly a diagnosis of a real disease but a description of behaviors that fall outside of societal norms. As such, the church needs to separate what might be biologically-based vs what is behavioral in order to determine how best to minister to those who claim to be mentally ill. However, I agree with the author's premise that we must treat all people with respect, regardless of whether they claim to be mentally ill or not. All men are made in the image and likeness of God and sinners in need of a savior. The church needs to face this issue in two ways. It needs to face the fact that much of mental illness is not a truly a diagnosis of a real disease but a description of behaviors that fall outside of societal norms. As such, the church needs to separate what might be biologically-based vs what is behavioral in order to determine how best to minister to those who claim to be mentally ill. However, I agree with the author’s premise that we must treat all people with respect, regardless of whether they claim to be mentally ill or not. All men are made in the image and likeness of God and sinners in need of a savior.

]]> By: Todd hiestand http://www.jrbriggs.com/unlearning-mental-illness-in-the-church/05/comment-page-1/#comment-2957 Todd hiestand Thu, 28 May 2009 22:49:16 +0000 http://www.jrbriggs.com/?p=1338#comment-2957 Good stuff here. Thanks dave. You might also check out mark Licitra's blog dedicated to mental illness and the church: www.marklicitra.com Good stuff here. Thanks dave. You might also check out mark Licitra’s blog dedicated to mental illness and the church: http://www.marklicitra.com

]]> By: This Week in the Blogosphere « Discipleship Remix http://www.jrbriggs.com/unlearning-mental-illness-in-the-church/05/comment-page-1/#comment-2956 This Week in the Blogosphere « Discipleship Remix Thu, 28 May 2009 22:12:00 +0000 http://www.jrbriggs.com/?p=1338#comment-2956 [...] http://www.jrbriggs.com/unlearning-mental-illness-in-the-church/05/ [...] [...] http://www.jrbriggs.com/unlearning-mental-illness-in-the-church/05/ [...]

]]> By: Anna Thomas Briggs http://www.jrbriggs.com/unlearning-mental-illness-in-the-church/05/comment-page-1/#comment-2954 Anna Thomas Briggs Thu, 28 May 2009 18:52:46 +0000 http://www.jrbriggs.com/?p=1338#comment-2954 Recently this question was asked by one of my profs "How do you personally keep from having compassion fatigue while keeping convictions about personal responsibilities for one's behavior?" The context relates to our class entitled "Abnormal Psychology". I was wondering how Dave would answer this question. As a Christian is there such a thing as compassion fatigue? I suppose one of the ways Christians avoid fatigue is by never engaging. However, a friend said she recently visited a church in the Seattle area that has been reaching out to a women with mental illness. They have invited her to the "barbecue" sort of speak. This women is continually disruptive. Causing huge sense on Sunday mornings. She has accused the pastor that has been reaching out to her as having an attraction to her, etc. What is the burnout threshold for those who choose to engage? Recently this question was asked by one of my profs “How do you personally keep from having compassion fatigue while keeping convictions about personal responsibilities for one’s behavior?” The context relates to our class entitled “Abnormal Psychology”. I was wondering how Dave would answer this question. As a Christian is there such a thing as compassion fatigue? I suppose one of the ways Christians avoid fatigue is by never engaging. However, a friend said she recently visited a church in the Seattle area that has been reaching out to a women with mental illness. They have invited her to the “barbecue” sort of speak. This women is continually disruptive. Causing huge sense on Sunday mornings. She has accused the pastor that has been reaching out to her as having an attraction to her, etc. What is the burnout threshold for those who choose to engage?

]]> By: Nancy in Bucks County http://www.jrbriggs.com/unlearning-mental-illness-in-the-church/05/comment-page-1/#comment-2953 Nancy in Bucks County Thu, 28 May 2009 17:49:55 +0000 http://www.jrbriggs.com/?p=1338#comment-2953 Amen to all written here. We must also not forget the families of those with mental illness. It is the silent sorrow we never talk about with our church family lest we make them 'uncomfortable'. Visible handicaps are tolerated today, the invisible remain taboo. I agree - invite someone who makes you uncomfortable to the church picnic, to sing in the choir, to hand out bulletins, to collate the newsletter. To Be Seen in the Church, serving HIM! Let the healing begin... Amen to all written here. We must also not forget the families of those with mental illness. It is the silent sorrow we never talk about with our church family lest we make them ‘uncomfortable’. Visible handicaps are tolerated today, the invisible remain taboo.
I agree – invite someone who makes you uncomfortable to the church picnic, to sing in the choir, to hand out bulletins, to collate the newsletter. To Be Seen in the Church, serving HIM! Let the healing begin…

]]> By: Tera http://www.jrbriggs.com/unlearning-mental-illness-in-the-church/05/comment-page-1/#comment-2952 Tera Thu, 28 May 2009 17:14:25 +0000 http://www.jrbriggs.com/?p=1338#comment-2952 I know that Joel Osteen's church gets quite a bit of flack nowadays, but you may want to look into their family ministry program for some practical tools. My former mentor is now the children's pastor at Lakewood, and has recently spent hundreds of thousands of dollars to provide a safe place for youth with special needs. His last child was born with autism, and he made it a goal not to forget these kids as so many churches often do... www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=532249580&ref=nf#/video/video.php?v=55405119580 I know that Joel Osteen’s church gets quite a bit of flack nowadays, but you may want to look into their family ministry program for some practical tools. My former mentor is now the children’s pastor at Lakewood, and has recently spent hundreds of thousands of dollars to provide a safe place for youth with special needs. His last child was born with autism, and he made it a goal not to forget these kids as so many churches often do…

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=532249580&ref=nf#/video/video.php?v=55405119580

]]> By: admin http://www.jrbriggs.com/unlearning-mental-illness-in-the-church/05/comment-page-1/#comment-2951 admin Thu, 28 May 2009 15:54:08 +0000 http://www.jrbriggs.com/?p=1338#comment-2951 Chris - Good thoughts. This seems to be the missional question, "Is the church willing to get into the mess of things." What church(es) do you think is/are doing a good job of getting into the mess of things? why? Chris –

Good thoughts.
This seems to be the missional question, “Is the church willing to get into the mess of things.”

What church(es) do you think is/are doing a good job of getting into the mess of things? why?

]]> By: Chris in RVA http://www.jrbriggs.com/unlearning-mental-illness-in-the-church/05/comment-page-1/#comment-2949 Chris in RVA Thu, 28 May 2009 14:08:03 +0000 http://www.jrbriggs.com/?p=1338#comment-2949 JR- I did a chaplaincy rotation in a locked psych unit during seminary and as I spent time with folks staying there I had a growing sense that, while their mental illness itself was a problem, what made it much, much worse was the context within which they were trying to deal with their illness. Many of them were regularly abused, mocked, and taken advantage of. With this realization came an increasing sense that the Church can and should provide the right type of community for those suffering with mental illness, where they can be accepted and loved and supported. This isn't easy, and it won't heal their illness, but as people of the Gospel we are called to no less. The question is whether or not we're willing to get in the mess of things... JR-

I did a chaplaincy rotation in a locked psych unit during seminary and as I spent time with folks staying there I had a growing sense that, while their mental illness itself was a problem, what made it much, much worse was the context within which they were trying to deal with their illness. Many of them were regularly abused, mocked, and taken advantage of. With this realization came an increasing sense that the Church can and should provide the right type of community for those suffering with mental illness, where they can be accepted and loved and supported. This isn’t easy, and it won’t heal their illness, but as people of the Gospel we are called to no less. The question is whether or not we’re willing to get in the mess of things…

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